I work with people who struggle with staying focused on important goals. They usually hate their work and that’s typically related to other people at work. They are stuck in some way in life and are feeling some emotional pain and really want to be excited and make meaningful progress to something rewarding. Below are four stories of success with clients.
When you’re ready to talk about your situation, take me up on the free strategy session here.
Charting a New Career Course
After 21 years as a full-time pastor I found myself in 100% commission sales feeling disoriented and frustrated. Mary helped me create and utilize tools to reorient to my new world and find ways to appreciate, enjoy and excel in it.
What helped me most was a process Mary facilitated for finding a way to define what I was experiencing (feeling “stuck”). I explored what feeling “stuck” looked like and the beliefs about myself and my situation. I described what would be present if I wasn’t stuck. At the same time I was assessing both the truth and falsehood of my situation and exploring ways to break out of it.
Mary helped me to chart a new course which led through success in sales to a new season of ministry which is my passion.
Brave Career Decisions Leads to Family Happiness
I really wanted to go back to school. I was a stay-at-home mom and “older” so the transition back to work was challenging already. My husband was another challenge. He wanted me to go back to teaching.
There I was in a 20 year marriage trying to convince my partner to change his mind. As adamant as I was to complete the master’s program, he was equally adamant with his objections that I give up the idea of a graduate program. He didn’t think I could manage the school demands much less give our two children the attention they needed and I wanted to provide. Mary understood. She listened with empathy and helped me focus on solutions. We met individually and with my husband and during all of the talking together, concerns were identified around the children’s care as well as strategies to support each other. I felt really well supported by Mary. She made it all sound doable and that kept me going. The results have been amazing. I’m graduating in May 2016 and I already have a job.
My daughter is graduating from high school and already has been accepted to a preferred college. My son couldn’t be happier and is looking forward to playing in the band next school year. Not only did I finish my graduate program with highest honors, I’ve been able to spend more time with my husband. Our marital stress is gone. We look like a family of “bopping heads”.
Everybody is getting along.
My biggest challenge: creating a sustainable, clear vision for my future.
A primary interrogation of my work with Mary was the question: did I want to continue on a career path of primarily “leading” or make a return to a career of primarily “doing”? Either way, I wanted to ensure my thinking was clear in this regard and the decision was fueled by deep reflection (not just emotional reaction). Mary provided thought-provoking articles and book recommendations that spoke directly to my concerns du jour.
She asked questions to provoke new thinking, challenged me to look deeply into my assumptions, and gently kept me on course during a critical time in my decision-making process. I came away from my sessions with Mary realizing that I have the makings of a solid leader; key strength/weaknesses were identified.
This knowledge allows me to work through my current workplace challenges with greater fluency and confidence, strive to hit my personal KPIs (key performance indicators} for the role (developed during my time with Mary) and move on once those are achieved.
Finding Courage to Reach for That Job
The challenges I was facing included life passage issues where both my career was changing and my opportunities were changing. Age-related, gender discrimination issues were present in multiple ways, including some of my own attitudes. There were some things I could “fix” and some I couldn’t fix.
Mary helped me make some of those changes, and was present while I agreed, although reluctantly that there were some realities I needed to accept. For example, there was a particular contract job that was important to me. To do my job with the client I had to deal with a difficult person who was assigned a facilitation role that impacted me and my client. For me this person was a massive “invalidator”. It seems to me in life we are presented with a plethora of problems due to an individual’s unique personality and/or unmet needs. This person was difficult for me because I experienced her as controlling, micromanaging, and inventing work that wasn’t necessary for both myself and my team.
Mary’s coaching helped me neutralize my response to her work style by becoming more objective about the work vs. allowing all my buttons to be pushed. Mary provided a place for venting and strategies for depersonalizing. This was hugely helpful. The result is that I survived the job and kept my paycheck. Actually, this “difficult” person and I ended as good friends and I was able to benefit professionally. Another example is the time I was seeking a very high level job, with a high salary range and responsibilities within a corporation. Jobs like these are very competitive and it was well-known that there is always a tendency to hire within. As an outsider, I was thrilled that I made it to the finish line with one other person.
When I had a brief anxiety moment before the interview, Mary’s help was tremendous. I was encouraged to “go after it”. It allowed me to do what I needed to do. A lot of us fail before we get started. I believe we can let failure teach us. We all aren’t going to be “President of the United States” however, the worst thing in the world, to me, is “not going after the prize”. Mary helped me deal with the disappointment of not getting the offer and truthfully it still stings. Yet, I would rather experience the “no” than live in fear of rejection and pass on the meaningful work opportunities. The lessons I learned from having the courage to reach for that job are invaluable. We must live our lives with courage and Mary’s coaching has helped me with courage.
Mary’s level of support is exceptional because of her background as a clinical therapist. I see life as just one big readjustment. Mary helps people develop coping skills for challenges. Stay focused. Practice objectivity. She helped me quiet the noise so I could hear the music.
Is it time to get focused on your life, career and work? Are you ready to deal with the challenges you’re facing and start making good progress? Then get your “I’ve Got This!” free strategy session here.